Is it weird for a girl to post pictures of her dildo no facebook?
He invited me to see "alison wonderland" WHAT THE FUCK THATS NOT A FIRST NAME/LAST NAME TYPE DEAL
You were directing traffic around her for 30min after she passed out in the middle of the road.
You really are best friends.
I brought up my Bobbly Flay drinking game in the interview. Of course I got the job.
Man, i was looking at the pictures i took last night in one i was on the Kentucky line fist pumping with a hobo..wth happened?
it was like i was on a global safari of uncircumcised men
I'll be in my room with a breakfast burrito at 2:30. It's up to you...
who started the 'put a scrunchy' around his balls' game?
Sitting in my kitchen at 3am, craving dick and eating peanut butter instead. I'm not sure how I feel about being 27.
Fire trucks are here again. It wasn't me this time.
I was out of weed and my vibrator broke, so I'm now at Red Lobster.
Fuck this. I'm adopting 12 cats and naming them after the 12 disciples. Maybe Jesus will have sympathy for me then.
I wanted to say "you're a souless cunt" but in a nice way. So I added a smiley face.
does anyone know where bryan is?
last i saw he was naked, and crying in the bathroom because there was no more booze.
Did I penguin dive down a hill last night?
Randomize
