also referred to as T.P.S. (Toddler Penis Syndrome)
Being hungover naked and coloring my hair. I guess I am not naked I have black latex gloves on. Give me a call.
im coming over.
he is so annoying
so stop sleeping with him
yeah but he is so hot when i'm drunk
I just watched a blind kid buy from one of the vending machines on campus...guess there's nothing like a good surprise?
Some Animals Are Total Jerks (10+ pics)
all i remember is screaming butter knifes are for pussies.
after watching ten minutes of "the decision," I conclude that King Lebron has more influence on America than Barak Obama. I love our countries values.
Your mom just threw up on me. Please come home.
No, he's ok. He just broke his teeth on the stripper pole. No biggie.
I pulled my bra outta my purse. Covered in honey mustard. I still lack an explanation.
23 Roommates Share Secrets Their Roomie Thinks They Don’t Know
and it seems i've caught your masturbating bug. thanks.
No she probably looked into my aura and saw that my penis would ruin her.
Can I get that on a shirt
I left the bar I'm on a bench across from the bowling alley taking a nap please come get me. I've had three lollipops.
I just wanted a bootycall and now somehow I'm at his parents playing dominoes. But they have tequila so it's cool
I'm taking the day off so I can get drunk at Whole Foods before noon
Is there a reason why your pubic hair is a plastic bag on my bathroom floor? And yes I know its yours... You wrote your name on the bag