Texts From Last Night

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  (707): View more from California

  im never drinking mad dog again and i have your belt.

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  (707): im never drinking mad dog again and i have your belt. http://tfl.nu/7lkv
  Replies (25) Good night (996) Bad night (484)
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  (404): View more from Georgia

  Its not alright that i make out with a manican.

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  (404): Its not alright that i make out with a manican. http://tfl.nu/ol2k
  Replies (4) Good night (705) Bad night (957)
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  (847): View more from Illinois

  just took a sink shower in Arbys bathroom

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  (847): just took a sink shower in Arbys bathroom http://tfl.nu/dq56
  Replies (12) Good night (895) Bad night (3806)
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  (401): View more from Rhode Island

  This kid is too lonely to be my drug dealer.

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  (401): This kid is too lonely to be my drug dealer. http://tfl.nu/lyuy
  Replies (1) Good night (926) Bad night (3015)
• Favorite

  (908): View more from New Jersey

  Don't blame the cocaine for your eating disorder.

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  (908): Don't blame the cocaine for your eating disorder. http://tfl.nu/vsy5
  Replies (3) Good night (1208) Bad night (3199)
• Favorite

  (920): View more from Wisconsin

  I bought a dress specifically for face plant durability... this is how serious I am about my drunk status this weekend

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  (920): I bought a dress specifically for face plant durability... this is how serious I am about my drunk status this weekend http://tfl.nu/kstp
  Replies (4) Good night (2816) Bad night (885)
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  (505): View more from New Mexico

  As shirtless as possible

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  (505): As shirtless as possible http://tfl.nu/35li
  Replies (3) Good night (1606) Bad night (507)
• Favorite

  (916): View more from California

  Please just fuck her. She's new to LA and doesn't know anyone nice.

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  (916): Please just fuck her. She's new to LA and doesn't know anyone nice. http://tfl.nu/f46v
  Replies (6) Good night (1541) Bad night (528)
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  (724): View more from Pennsylvania

  On a scale of one to liver failure, how bad would it be if I played thunderstruck alone?

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  (724): On a scale of one to liver failure, how bad would it be if I played thunderstruck alone? http://tfl.nu/9ka9
  Replies (4) Good night (614) Bad night (307)
• Favorite

  (828): View more from North Carolina

  I asked him if we could hang out sometime when we weren't hammered. He said he'd email me his number... that's when I knew I was going to die alone

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  (828): I asked him if we could hang out sometime when we weren't hammered. He said he'd email me his number... that's when I knew I was going to die alone http://tfl.nu/fll1
  Replies (1) Good night (410) Bad night (975)
• Favorite

  (646): View more from New York

  Cutting up lines with the edge of my birth control packet. Just reminding you this is the person you've CHOSEN to be monogamous with.

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  (646): Cutting up lines with the edge of my birth control packet. Just reminding you this is the person you've CHOSEN to be monogamous with. http://tfl.nu/g4xi
  Replies (5) Good night (604) Bad night (935)
• Favorite

  (312): View more from Illinois

  The guy had great intentions when throwing us free beer off the balcony... but of course I was the one to get hit in the face because that's the kind of luck I have

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  (312): The guy had great intentions when throwing us free beer off the balcony... but of course I was the one to get hit in the face because that's the kind of luck I have http://tfl.nu/kcpe
  Replies (3) Good night (719) Bad night (504)
• Favorite

  (859): View more from Kentucky

  This girl looks like an elf and is obviously on coke. I want to be her.

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  (859): This girl looks like an elf and is obviously on coke. I want to be her. http://tfl.nu/8e8b
  Replies (6) Good night (593) Bad night (355)
• Favorite

  (919): View more from North Carolina

  Well I was thinking of taking him out for drinks then lecturing him about his drinking... kind of like an open minded intervention

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  (919): Well I was thinking of taking him out for drinks then lecturing him about his drinking... kind of like an open minded intervention http://tfl.nu/x7bj
  Replies (1) Good night (491) Bad night (293)
• Favorite

  (434): View more from Virginia

  Maybe if I get to know him I'll stop wanting to fuck his wife so much.

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  (434): Maybe if I get to know him I'll stop wanting to fuck his wife so much. http://tfl.nu/nqo5
  Replies (4) Good night (416) Bad night (256)

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