You know, I didn't realize this at the time, but it appears that I am being "heavily petted" by 3 grown men in that pic.
If these were biblical times then you'd be a Roman Senator.
so he must've not known that your lastname is Came because everytime someone would say your name he would scream "NO SHE DIDNT" to the whole party. He must've not been too good then either.
we were having sex and she freaked out when i said nipple
I was more traumatized by the table collapsing while i was going down on you.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I had his cock in my mouth and he still wouldn't shut up about Star Wars.
Oh, I forgot to ask if u have any idea what happened to the back of my ear and if u were present when I almost fell off the roof...
Look, as a friend I'm asking to see a picture of his tiny dick
Well I don't think you can suck his dick while he's making pizza. I think that goes against some health codes.
I just want to have beer shits in my own bathroom. Is that too much to ask for?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
And I'm only telling you that because I really wanted to use 'my boyfriend' and 'dick biscuit' in the same sentence.
Thanks for your faith in my ability to stay sober while writing final essays. It's...unearned.
I felt like the hulk waking up from a black out except with munchies
The groom's brother was an accomplishment. Then I remembered he was also the officiant. Check and check.
you could be the only one getting laid right now....yet your sitting in here making goat noises
Well I typed "penicillin a" into the search engine and before I could finish "penicillin and drinking" popped up. Google knows me too well.
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