I want to take things slow emotionally, but fast physically
I don't wanna hook up with anyone from minnesota
everybody there reminds me of mashed potatoes... white and lumpy
I'm gonna write a book, Things that go bump in the night: The story of Katelyn. Chapter one, my roommate is a dumb whore.
u just dont fucking get it...you try and cum while your cat is staring at you.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
90 In a 65. Talked my way out of it with the i have to poop story. i am the ticket jesus
I found a wheel chair. there is now a high chance im going to be fired from this job
he kept asking me if i had been in a pool or a lake recently, i didnt want to say i know where the swimmers ear came from. shower sex.
I need to have sex with you on our hotel room window ledge... This is a need not a request.
On 3 separate occasions, she grabbed my bullhorn to announce to the entire party she had fucked me.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Update... last night a man tried to bite my ear. I think he swallowed my pearl earring.
Somehow those two combined like captain planet and shit went haywire
You went into the shower with my roommate and cursed him out asking why he was there
I wanna fuck that hideous moustache right off your face. get the confetti ready for the festivities
YOU TRIED TO SWIM IN HER FISHTANK. I don't think she's going to call you.
I JUST WANT TO HAVE AWKWARD SEXUAL EXPERIENCES WITH HIM.
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