C thinks vomiting on the batroom floor = reaon not to party. Lies. Party continues.
So apparently when I roll on X I find 'dick ina box' not only hilarious but also sexually arousing.
He actually believes he's not an alcoholic if he doesn't go to meetings.
i ate 2 chicken nuggets and puked out 5. that doesn't even make mathematical sense
Last night the nurse at the ER told me that she wished all her drunk patients were like me. Then she commented on my socks...
I puked all over his apartment, then slept with the skinniest girl here. Which isn't saying much in Ohio.
my six pack is really starting to show since I started fucking everything that moves
I think that girl got really offended when I made out with baby Jesus.
Yepp, I had to be the one to explain that the girl who was slapping people in the face with a dildo was my drunk girlfriend.
I had sex with marker all over my face so I can do just about anything.
Dude I was walking down the street and threw up in a plastic cvs bag. Tequila wins again.
I'm a lady who knows what she wants in life, and that's uncommitted dick.
I mean, don't most people have like a two week grace period where it's okay to ditch new friends?
He came so fast i dont think he got it all the way in. He apologized and gave me his favorite baseball card.
27 year olds can still do oral in a car right? Or is that trashy?
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