Yo I'm just eating dinner now. U ready to go out?
Ya ya. Where you eating?
Cereal and beer. U kno u want in.
My penis is the apex of life and all other references. Lookin for a cheap vagina at this point. And cheap Korean BBQ
He gave me an orgasm with his left hand...and he's right handed. Of course he's a keeper.
there's no toilet paper. I'm using wheat bread.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
His car is carseat is compatible. I checked while we were banging in the back seat...
The bartender was shocked when I took the mop bucket from him and told him I'd take care of my friends puke.
How do I enter a double puke and rally into my calorie counter?
Alright, who started the "how long till dereck gets deported from Australia" pool? I want in on that.
Bad Decision October is in full swing. I was telling people that "I put on eye makeup today, I'm takin' a dude home with me!".
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I was trying to get everyone to go to the bar but I puked on my hands, so nobody took me seriously.
It's cosmic balancing. My vagina is an instrument of karmic retribution.
Well, it's a fine line between people-watching and boob-staring. It's a gray area. But we're in Paris. Let's leave it at that.
he was like "can i get a kiss" and i was like "can i get a taco"
Just so you know, I woke up with 2 oven mits in my bed and no clothes on.
I need to leave my mind and my stupid vagina are having fight over who's right
Randomize