I just watched 2 blind guys walk into each other head on in providence. It pays to pregame in your car.
who has that picture of us looking like alcoholics at the zoo?
Call me when your ready for an explanation about the ham in your vagina.
Well, I want to see you regardless of whether or not you will lick whipped cream off my body.
Either way, we will celebrate half Christmas the only way we can. Completely and irresponsibly wasted.
I really want to fuck that guy in the full wind breaker suit
just got home to find my brothers naked on the floor covered in chocolate. i am now nervous about sleeping in the same room as them
If he thinks that that is an acceptable way to ask me out he is out his goddamn ginger mindddddd.
I just sold my hat for three car bombs. I call that a win.
Stoned, drunk, and walking into the library. Look at me multitasking!
Hey! Where are you? It's Irrisponsible Patio time and you're not here firing shots down summer student's throats
I'll never get why we had to sing the entire full house theme to the cab driver.... never drinking rum again.
Everyone was in the walk-in getting high, and I had to be all cool. Serving soup and salads. Night manager status doesn't pay enough.
My ass is in a myriad of pain right now
Lesson learned - Taco Bell before a long night of BDSM is a BAD idea
The only thing good about being back at work is the lunch time hand jobs from the MILF
Randomize
