...i had to draw her a diagram of her own vagina. including a little arrow to the clitoris. shouldn't it be the other way around?!?
and then he said "my sister has the same underwear!" please come get me.
Bottle rocket just missed my head by about 3 inches. Of course I'm being safe
we talked for like an hour, i feel like we really bonded. i mean i was simultaneously giving him head but you get the point.
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then you gave the doctors and nurses bloody high fives
This went bad. Everyone is crying, i dont know why and I am really uncomfortable.
Just found a partially digested mushroom under my bed. Thanks for that.
It's amazing how many friends she makes simply by carrying that flask of whiskey everywhere she goes.
pregamed for the floor meeting. so stoned. i keep thinking my RA is shrinking.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I walked into the kitchen and twelve of them were just staring at the oven. Freshmen are the weirdest drunks ever.
You also hate cartoons and musicals, so I will take that to mean the movie was as awesome as I thought it was..smoke weed
Got drunkdialed by my estranged mom while wallowing in pinkeye drinking 100 proof eating ramen alone. Year summed up perfectly.
Sex in a tree, bucket list CHECK!
I am so horny that I an legitimately concerned for your safety when I see you tonight.
I had to ask my mom to look for my kegle ball...
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