do you know mcdonalds refuses to give out large cups of water now? you have to buy a bottle or they give you a small cup. No exceptions.
RUDE.
I said FINE, then I'd like 7 small waters and 2 of those nifty carrying cases to carry about my h2o.
outsmarted mickey deeeees
You need to find a way to go down on me and lick my toes at the same time
I'll google it
I'll see your cousin, and raise you a sister.
Can I get a "hallelujah" for railing my pastors daughter last night?
I can't wait for you to see these terrible photos I'm about to have taken with some stripper looking girls. I don't know what this photographer is thinking
For future reference, Twizzlers CAN leave welts.
Just found out I own a pyramid. Fuck your good grades, I'm living in my pyramid.
Well for number 40 i would prefer to at least like the guy attached to the dick
I told you, we're just gonna get ripped and light sparklers
Boob shaped ice luge is ordered for my bday. Boom
I can't even drink.
The liquor comes out the nipples. Out. The. Nipples.
Can't a white girl just get drunk on a Sunday night and eat rice crispy treats. SHIT
We're just Facebook friends. Use guy logic. I tapped your wife in high school, 20 years and 60 lbs ago, when she was hot and experimental. Why would I mess with that now? It would ruin the vivid memories of her that I keep in my spank bank.
I will find you...
Date idea: we should go to the store and buy all the different kinds of Lay's and eat them all
We probably are going to die. So. Thanks for agreeing to be my Maid of Honor even though I torture you.
you were trying to drink the laundry detergent and yelling blue drankkkkk
Randomize
