i just puked in front of my entire floor a girl on crutches asked iof i needed help hahaaa fuck ima damn fool
There is a new fb quiz: "are you at ypical woman, future ex or from crazy town" - should i take it?
Aren't all three of those the same though?
If you're still awake, how rude would it be if I masturbated in her new apartment on moving day? If you're asleep, then ask me how it was.
If you're still on campus there's a jack and coke in the bathroom of fondren science Bldg. Too strong to bring to class.
Had to awkwardly dig through all my fake ID's to get my real one so I could vote.......Model citizen over here.
Do you know how I hurt my ankle or my shoulder? Or the origin of any of the following mystery bruises: left quad, left wrist, right elbow. Thanks for playing.
I can't finger myself when I'm all distracted about whether or not your family is going to like me
Chose not to courtesy flush and the CEO huffed the result. I feel powerful.
Waking up in a NH rest stop and reading through my texts is definitely a familiar low
Personally, if my roommate had a nice friend who made me dinner, gave me free beer, a 4am meal, a couch to sleep on in an apartment on the beach, and breakfast when I woke up, and I found out that said roommate was fucking her, I'd be all... right on! She's cool! Thanks for the quesadillas!
Never should have deleted her from my facebook. My new girl is so much hotter than she is, I just want to passive aggressively rub it in her face
You literally chaperoned my booty call.
why do guys have to express their feelings when they know your seeing someone else ? I fucked him anyways to make him feel better , and to know what he's missing.
I know EXACTLY where things went wrong with her...I didn't use Cheetos as a wooing tool.
I'm wearing men's underwear
I don't know what to do with that information...
Randomize
