i got so high last night i cried hysterically for like 5 minutes because i dont have any superpowers
I hope he's okay, but I also hope he shows up with an eyepatch
I mean, we started to hook up but my asthma attack kind of killed the mood
My autobiography is now tentatively titled "I'm Fucking the DJ, and Other Ways to Party for Cheap"
I miss the good ol' days when we would yell at strangers from your balcony while wearing our mexican ponchos in the middle of the day.
what ever happened to our old dealer?
Well, it was good.. One step forward for my vaj.. One giant leap backwards for my integrity.
I have a broken liver
I see that the whole "let's take a break from drinking" has worked out really well for us.
They need to leave so I can start drinking shamefully.
That kid i sell weed to just had his mom give him a ride over here she waited in the car while he bought a bag
Trust me. Drunk Scrabble is not a good idea. Arguments over the legitimacy of the word "Pickle" break out, things are said, friendships are ruined. It's ugly.
I think Saturday night will always be a mystery to me, except for buying an excessive amount of birthday shots for everyone and yelling BIRTHDAY SHOTS before every shot.
I mean there are things broken right and left, I woke up surrounded by dog statues, and we had a vodka bubble bath.
What the matter? A girl can't play some Super Mario without being accused of being high?
I just spent 45 minutes and a really well-put together Power Point trying to convince her to use my dog as baby Jesus in her church's play.
You know you're drunk when you have to be picked up out of a bathtub.
Randomize
