I don't know which is worse: knowing all the free porn websites, or knowing which days they update their free porn.
she doesn't hate you. She just thinks you need a personality adjustment, speech therapy and weight watchers.
He passed out drunk on top of me. Fully erect. Still inside me. Woke up like 1 minute later, and continued.
i just added your friend Valery on the FB just to comment on your tits.... thought id give you a heads up
i love when the champions come out to play im bringin the shock collar this weekend
I didn't pay for a single drink 'help me I'm poor' was my drink pickup line. it totally worked.
I don't know. I was hiding and the bed was banging. I am going to sleep now in someone's car.
Well, I made it all the way to the gas station. And from there, I begged a cab driver who was parked outside, to give me a piggy back ride the final 2 blocks to my apartment. I wasn't in the cab. Didn't have to pay. Drunk me is smart, and very lazy.
there is absolutely nothing wrong with two grown men staying up all night blowing lines drinking white wine and playing call of duty. don't judge me
Yeah but you let me touch your butt. You're clearly the winner.
I wish my nipples were as well behaved as yours.
Just had a customer call his drug dealer in front of me but act like it was normal call.
IT'S FUCKING BABY SEASON ON FACEBOOK. MY VAGINA WANTS TO THROW UP
Who brings a stripper home to ninja turtle bed sheets
Me and I got head
I thought i was doing pretty well but I walked into my first class and everyone on my side of the room immediately asked how drunk and high I was
Randomize
