but really, i care about skinny girls as much as michael vick cares about rotweilers
I just tried to pee in a pad to see if it was like a diaper. it's not.
so we started it doggy style, but since we were really drunk kinda fell to the side and turned into a 'lazy dog'... my new favorite position btw
Just an fyi, teatherball while wasted might be the hardest sport ever.
Beach body diet is off. Pizza hut worked its way back onto my google chrome top 8
it's to the point where working 2 jobs this summer will absolutely not cover how much i will spend on alcohol next semester.
just threw up on my speech test, so much for a great semester
ur not supposed to find someone to make out with when ur bf takes u to his SISTERS house to hang out with her and her husband
IT ISN'T. I'M A LITTLE HIGH.
YOU'RE ALWAYS A LITTLE HIGH.
NO. IT'S RARE THAT I'M A LITTLE HIGH. I'M ALWAYS HIGH AS FUCK. THERE'S A DIFFERENCE.
Had sex in a cemetery last night during a thunderstorm. I feel like my goth points have skyrocketed
Of course I'll be there. I never miss an opportunity to smell like cigarettes, cheap beer, and shame.
The homeless woman that called me a "dirty looking cunt" the other day, was standing outside Starbucks today with a sign that said "Jesus loves you."
Enough talk of my burning loins. How is your day?
I know this shouldnt be a problem, but there are too many women hitting on me. I dont know what to do
I need to find a divorced guy with a boat and let my tits do the talking
Randomize
