I just speedwalked down the broken metro escalator while high. Basically all my worst fears combined
this just has baby written all over it
why do all canadians talk like horny gerbils are stuck in their throats?
He scored a 8.5/10 on that girls powerpoint. Of course I slept with him
Doing lines of cocaine in the bathroom and the word 'better' do not belong in the same sentence.
Decided in my tanked state last night purchase 2 weeks worth of xanax, so I can guess my way thru this week and finals. Soberly, I decided it would be a great way to test my knowledge of finance.
Not good... He ate my chips. Thats not a sex analogy for anything. My actual potato chips... gone. I lost on both ends.
i had a mental breakdown over a math asignment proposed to a glass of chocolate milk then burned my hands when i acidentally leaned on the stove i have the grill marks burned on my hands i can see them
its only been 20 minuts since i last saw you
My mother is a bitch. She just outed me to my dad. He wants to meet you by the way...
That's what I love about being a lesbian. My roommate's boyfriend watched her finger me and then he made me pancakes in the morning. AND THEN HE LEFT.
just chugging fertility tea and vodka, no big deal.
whoa whoa whoa, you're saying I shouldn't post pics of you balls deep in a southern hottie?
I don't think I've ever been sadder than the way I feel when I finish my meal while I'm high
Hypothetically speaking, at what point does fire become too much fire?
sorry about your sharpie. alex wanted to shave the left side of his body so he had me draw a line over him with a ruler
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