how hairy? two words: wookie tits
So I went to have a snack...can you please tell me why there's a condom in the hummus?
so we started it doggy style, but since we were really drunk kinda fell to the side and turned into a 'lazy dog'... my new favorite position btw
I'm putting "buy a bottle of scotch" on my "productive things to do to procrastinate studying for finals" list
Just got a voicemail from a guy referring tp himself "as chest hair guy". If I'm coming home to a intervention I understand.
It's going to be so weird waking up tomorrow morning fully rested completely sober and not covered in piss or bruises.
So I wore a corset to school. Fuck laundry.
I'd go lesbian for $50 and a good phone case.
Do you congratulate someone for having bigger tits, or is that a no no?
Actually here it's more "lie around naked in a dark room" weather.
My morning started with my mom giving me the number for a substance abuse councellor. How's your day going?
I have already been up, showered, had a cup of coffee brought to me, added a little rum to cure the hangover, had sex and kicked him out and it's only 1pm. Successful day so far.
His dick isn't even good enough to be this much of an asshole
so the casino kicked my ass last night, i'm pretty sure i hit a new level of hungover....just showered with my sunglasses on because the bathroom light is too bright
His sister hates me so I took his virginity on her bed
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