I just drove by a church. On the sign out front was written 'crocodile cock'. On both sides.
Why would you say my penis is small in front of so many people?
seriously when did my vagina become a soup kitchen for the poor
I would compare it to a jeffrey but in smoothie form. More drugs in here than Bobby Brown's sock drawer.
She told me she loves her boyfreind while she was giving me head. He must be a nice guy
when you come home i just want to let you know we are cats now. and we are out of eggs.
My vagina has made plenty life decisions and I would like to point out very few if not any of them were in my favor.
Did I try to sell your body for chicken tenders last night?
The Dick I got last night was so phenomenal that I had to take a fucking personal day today.
Do you wanna do something, or just stare at each other and fantasize about death like we usually do
But actually he solved 40% of my life problems just in one dicking
This chick just walked out of the men's room with molly all over her nose and her shirt half unbuttoned. She nodded to all of us and said "gentlemen" as she exited
I accidentally put Bacardi in my coffee this morning. I ain't even mad.
Can you come over?
Sex??
Sure but there’s also a squirrel in my garage I need you to take care of.
I can barely operate my hands; what makes you think I can operate my dick
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