we sang "a whole new world" together. either he's my gay best friend or the love of my life.
He poured the shots. We did them together. I cheersd him out of the shower
i'm sure god appreciates how great my boobs look during this fine christmas eve mass
she puked as i came inside her. that has to mean something.
I made mike pull over so I could lay in the grass. He made me get up cuz I looked dead and people were passing. It was like 6:30am.
You didn't even properly utilize my pigtails.
SORRY! Pervert came out for a bit. BAD PERVERT! BACK IN YOUR HOME!
Juss got out of jail; shes still in there tryin to sing her abc's backwards bc the cops neva asked her too... Whebever she gets to t she starts singin the tequilla song
We fucked in my trunk while on the clock....what did you do at work today?
Well, if you're getting/have gotten your dick sucked, you're welcome. If not, I tried. Step up your game, pussy. I pulled a MacGuyver and got mine. No excuses bro.
Can cross "get fingered at a state park" off my bucket list
"Only you can prevent yeast infections."
Opened my notebook to coke all over the pages. So, if that's any indication on how this weekend went.
After sex he brought chocolates and said he loves RuPaul's Drag Race. How many points does he score for that?
I always knew I would be boring and die in an Uber.
I'm sorry i showed you my boobs.. I probably shouldn't have done that.
Randomize
