Alex, there's no such thing as a fancy sex store.
Here's an idea...how about I take shots by myself and drunk dial you around noon?
vagina is talking i cant
I just remember thinking that if i ran really fast through the house, no one would notice i was naked.
I wonder what it's like for my roommate to live bicuriously thro my sex life
he told her he was actually impressed that she had fucked more people in this house than the four dudes living in it.
Boob shaped ice luge is ordered for my bday. Boom
I can't even drink.
The liquor comes out the nipples. Out. The. Nipples.
Get this. He's a red head and he works at country oven bakery. He will forever be known as the gingerbread man.
By the way, just opened the browser on my phone for the first time today... And it was it the "images" section of "who invented ass fucking"
So thanks for that
In that state of mind I managed to bounce back from getting hit by a golf cart and convince an investigations officer that I was okay to go into the game.
I just went to add a song I had never heard before to my "high as fuck" playlist and it was already there.
You've got until 8 and then I'm kicking down your door and pouring a beer down your ass via funnel
I don't really feel bad about it, but I legit just squirted in the back of an Uber and it makes me think how many times has this happened before?!?!
I just spent the better half of my Friday night alone, naked eating McDonalds. Not my worst start of a new year
She wanted a dick pic so I sent her brett Favres dick pic then she asked why I have pictures of old men's beautiful dicks
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