Whssdazt areerg yiu up to? U thijk ur lame!
read your last text- its a foreign language-im not ignoring you, easyyy
you went to subway and got pissed when they refused to deep fry your sub
yo dibs on the gosselin haired one.
Is it bad to go up to the security desk and ask them for the name of the guy I signed in last night? I have absolutley no clue
I only have two playlists on my iPod. One for when im getting drunk, one for when I'm getting high. Is this something to be worried about?
i just realized i dont have a sober facebook picture since 2007
Welll when you have a beer at 8:30 am you've already decided whaat kind of Sunday it ism
how did the keg end up in the top bunk?
When we were eating pie last night, I dropped some, and not only did you not judge me for far surpassing the 5 second rule, you let me use your foot to sock mop with. You're a good friend.
I never thought my Saturday night would end up with someone crawling around my carpet for 3 hours trying to pick up spilled coke...
I never thought my Saturday night would end up with ME crawling around your carpet for 3 hours trying to save my investment.
The police report said "I asked the suspect if he had any identification. He replied yes and gave me a Pizza Hut gift card"
you need a warning label. Just announcing that you are Scottish is seen more as a challenge. Those guys have no idea what they are getting into.
I just jerked him off with one hand while holding my wine glass with the other and watching Congo. I feel like this was a preview to my married life...
His dog ate the vibrator. The WHOLE vibrator. We spend the morning after trying to make it vomit up the battery. Why does this always happen to me?
We blew shit up to. With a cannon.
Randomize
