remember them days when you seriously wanted your mom to marry rev run and we would always talk shit about justine?
joeyyyy why you always taken cheeseburgers from me?!?!?!
People kept wishing me happy birthday last night. apparently i was 21st birthday drunk
Well hello freshman 15, didn't see you there until I tried on last years summer clothes.
He just compared himself to a majestic butterfly in regards to the lack of girlfriends. i don't even know what to say.
i'm already feeling the tequila hangover i'm going to have on friday
So drunk. Washed my hair un pancheros sink cus I was so hot.
got my wristband ripped off, was told i can only be served water. please find me, i'll be running through the fountain
stef broke her leg trying to vault over the coffee table. these olympics drinking games are going to fucking kill us
Is cereal technically a soup?
Fuck, I'm high.
He recreated the night that started all my mothers days. We shared a joint, drank Boones Farm, and dry humped to the Beastie Boys. Then I cried over MCA's death. Best. Gift. Ever.
Today, my weed came in a pokéball. I officially love my dealer.
I've been continuously high for the last 48 hours, and just broke my 4th vibrator. Coincidence? FIND ME A MAN I BEG OF YOU.
Well, that's not my fault. I make decisions all the time when I'm drunk.
the cop found his r2d2 bong and asked me if i ever smoked out of him. i'm like, no sir. he's like ahh. if i were to smoke, it'd definitely be out of some star wars character.
easily made my night.
He's such a jerk. If only his penis was attached to someone else
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