We will have to stop frequently for food, stretching legs, interesting things on the side of the road, and sex. So you might as well eat.
so... thinking about masturbating finally
taking the losers way out I see
I don't know what kind of drugs you were on last night but you kept trying to highlight my face because you said I was important
I've never had a woman show me her venereal disease results in a bar before.
Any little, cute, petite blondes with you?
Nah, I got some slutty brunettes though.
Ok lesson learned. Don't lick the spoon when making mushroom chocolates. The kitchen walls are melting.
can we get together and have a vodka water gun fight? i need to get som intense excersise/alcohol
I think I've had 45 beers today though So things are looking up.
You were making out with a freshman and said you wanted to back to his place. Then when you got to the door to leave you said "never mind." He sad it wasn't fair and you got all serious and told him "welcome to the real world kid."
GOT MY PERIOD AND AN INTERNSHIP OFFER THIS IS A WONDERFUL DAY
apparently when a guy says "if there's anything missing in your life, I will provide" he's not expecting attractive lesbians to be the answer.
P.s. I loved that your balls smelled like coconut
So apparently Facebook just randomly finds the girl who gave me a hard handy despite having no mutual friends...
He can kiss the multicultural 3 some goodbye
Stop saving videos when you’re using my pornhub account!!! My girlfriend just tried to finger my butt because she thinks I’m into that
Randomize
