i may or may not have a boner. what are your thoughts
drinking steel reserve before noon and watching the price is right... 211... bet i pass out before then.
after we finished, she said she had been a backup performer for Cirque du Soleil. THAT flexible.
there are 2 things i love giving: blowjobs & backrubs. how can i tell them that without sounding like a slut
He adopted an old drug sniffing dog so that he won't lose his weed around the house anymore. It works.\n
It's so hard to find a shirt to wear out that is easily taken off, cut off my paramedics, but says "I'm a grown, respected woman"
you should have walked with me to my car. you just missed a girl rip off her bra and throw it into a dumpster and scream mardi gras
Our penis' have led to more networking than mark zuckerberg.
So the crazy cock blocking bitch sent her a picture of her boobs using MY phone and said: he's busy at the moment
By the way if you come home and I'm not wearing pants, just go with it. I didn't have the energy to go searching for some.
He just kept mumbling that he was too drunk for society and then he peed in a bush
there’s plenty of nice guys out there with good jobs and NO felonies!
She's Jesus crazy. And one if not more other forms of crazy. She's 2.5+ crazy.
How’s your Christmas Eve so far?
I just chased my melatonin with red wine. It’s 12:00pm.
I'm always down for nudity.
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