Of course we end up in a gay bar... And I have to tell you there are some hot dudes here, should I pass around your Facebook?
So how was he last night?
Five-minute foot-long.
Honestly there's alot of things I'm confused about the only thing I know for certain about last night is that I ate pizza
It's sad that I have started checking out the ring finger before the rack...I'm getting old
you definitely made a grilled cheese using your iron..
ya and it worked didnt it??
They're sharing a mixed drink at a bar with straws...its like a disney movie with booze
no jill really. Evrything around me is talking to me. The plant, my dog, the tv,the lamp. Its amazing.
Found a 10-can wizard staff hidden in our closet. Did we cut someone off?
That's yours. We cut you off.
Not many best friends can say they've all made out with a homeless guy
Wanna skype?
Can your lips gently and pleasantly suck on my balls via skype? If not, then no.
Made a holiday JibJab of all my fucks. How's your night?
Is 1:30 too early for the bar?
Do you want my opinion or society's?
I want your company
I need a drink and a shade of lipstick that will put the fear of God in a man's heart.
I woke up spooning with two strangers on Saturday morning... I felt like a sexual sandwich
In hindsight, maybe rearranging his living room because he has OCD while he was out wasnt the greatest idea. Though it'll keep him busy for HOURS
Randomize
