I woke up this morning and "The Wood" was on tv. Touche TBS, touche.
Yeah no shit. My mom is giving me winecoolers as we watch a show abt alcoholics
just walked into the room and her sister said loudly, "do him, or I will."
jersey shore drinking game rules must be edited. almost died. how is it possible for a person to say guido that many times
you took out flashcards at the bar and went around asking guys what totalitarianism meant.
if you wouldnt have been fucking me hard and crazy like that then my bed wouldn't have broke. you owe me 600.
so you admit it was good then??
i had to pay fifty dollars for throwing up in the limo, 60 fucking dollars to throw up all over myself
she's a kindergarten teacher now. The teacher desks are the perfect height for fucking. I'm delaying the break up a few weeks.
This hurricane was the perfect excuse to buy 2 pounds of animal crackers and a case of beer. It's on Sandy.
Well would you like to come over anyway? I will be wearing sweatpants and disappointment. Also, I have Jack Daniels and I've managed to get drunk in under half an hour. But my boobs look awesome.
Can't decide if this guy is hot or if I'm just bored.
Sex is clearly the solution either way.
Most of my life can be described like an HBO prison drama.
Are you drunk? You left me a voicemail at 5:59 AM of you making dolphin sounds.
He wants to play improv games now whenever he gets drunk. Sometimes I just do not have the energy for that kind of a thing
I wish I got tanner on friday but I feel like I spent most of my time puking in the bathroom. I love my life
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