I haven't worn deodorant in like three days and have been laying around in my underwear listening to music and drinking. I think i've made my own Bonnaroo in my apartment.
her orgasm sounded like a fucking walrus crying.
I just showed my boobs to our astate representative hahahahahahha
We went out. i got lost. dunno where they were. they slept in the car. i slept in an outdoor shower. i dont know anything else.
Yeah I hope so. Definately just saw two freshmen in very authentic togas and cotton ball beards. This new class is stepping it up.
I'm at work, and just realized I the beer smell I keep getting random whiffs of is my bra. I fail at life.
A beer is a heart your wish makes!!!
You may now shotgun with the bride
I just saw my 7th grade teacher at the club. We had a pretty good talk over drinks. Turns out we both like dancing on tables.
Vodka Vensday. With a Russian accent... It counts.
Btw, I feel the need to make sure we have no misunderstanding about this. So here goes. I'll happily mess around with you again. However, I probably won't do it while you're dressed like a creepy clown. Or any clown.
Good, I would never sleep with your boyfriend , or send you an edible arangment
I was going to learn how to knit but I got high instead.
The NSA quit spying on phones. I'm sending you SO MANY dick pics.
Saw your dad at the bar last night... And again this morning when he left. Told you not to mess with me bitch.
Randomize
