apparentely "Beer Pong Champ" is not a profession, no wonder they havent called me back......
told ya
I swallowed and made him pancakes in the morning. I feel almost as desperate as Jennifer Aniston at this point.
his dick got so hard in his pants and it broke his zipper
I think if I could use my boobs as a second pair of hands everything would be ok
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He started doing the gator chop at my vag and said he couldn't wait to "chomp" on it later...and I still slept with him. I hate gainesville.
They broke our car window and then wrote "great night" on the next
I am both excited and frightened by the fact that this much everclear is legal here. Best vacation ever.
Don't blame me. I told you I didn't know if I had a key to those hancuffs.
Oh yeah, found out i got it from my boyfriend's wife. Thanks though.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Would you mind pretending to be lesbians just for like three emails?
Sometimes I wish I lived alone because there would be no one to judge me if I wanted to have whiskey and popcorn for breakfast.
I legitimately thought he died. I even called his mom at 3am and told her. Im done with vodka.
So our night ended with 6 cruisers, a fire truck, and an ambulance. Also, lots of blood. How was yours?
I just caught my bangs on fire trying to lite a bowl while driving. Thank god it wasn't my eyebrows like last time.
I opened the bathroom door and the starting point gaurd was eating out my art history professor
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