When we made out her lip\nose ring fell out in my mouth. Awkward?
at least after i hook up with someone i have the decency to ignore them
girl in the front row yawned. double jointed jaw. i know where i'll be sitting next class
Weird question, would you want to do fetish porn? you get paid.
He doesn't need to speak English. He needs to speak sex.
I hope he didn't notice that my shirt was inside out when I told him I didn't have sex with the guy. Kind of a dead giveaway.
Well if he truly loves me he will just have to accept my flaws. And that includes a tequila dependency and borderline lesbianism.
All you need to do now is invest in a Speedo and start going door to door.
we told you you couldn't get your dick sucked because you were a girl and you yelled at us and said we were 'discriminating you'
Seriously I'm not after your cock. It's a nice bonus, like finding $20 in the dryer, but not the reason I hang out with you.
How do I convince my friend not to get tattoo tributes to her cats?
WHO DOES THAT
I told her it'd send up tons of red flags and she responded by telling me they're her babies. And she's sober.
We're too hungover to prance.
Still fucking the ballerina?
She can put her legs behind her head.
Enough said
There is an episode of "how it's made" on tv right now. The subject is tequila and water beds. Basically my life.
On a scale of having tea with Ghandi to the apocalypse how bad of an idea is it to drink with a 100 degree fever?
Randomize
