awww and there was just a proposal on stage with the pussycat dolls !!!!!
Did someone propose they get off the stage?
I just found out the guys at work had a bet as to who could sleep with me before i move away.
Who won?
All of them.
This boy just came into class wearing sperrys and a polo but also carrying a longboard. I'm unequivocably attracted to his level of doucheyness.
I need to shower. I still have paint on me from the homeless guys
And then I passed out in my towel and was woken up by my roommate introducing me to her trick for the night.
I would not be watching the debate if there wasn't drinking involved. Let's be honest.
He told me I was his first American. I feel like I should've brought a flag to plant on him.
I mean technically the bite was both in my nose and on the outside of it. I thought I was going to need stitches or something.
Why was his mouth around your nose anyways?
It was just one of those nights, man.
Did I run into a tree or get punched in the face?
Both.
It just smells like spaghetti and despair.
Plus i lost a button on my shirt and we got free drinks all night. Sorry I'm not sorry.
Dude i'm still drunk and i'm feeding a raccoon cereal from my bedroom window
I banged a guy named Robbie last night and in the middle of sex he begged me to scream santos. I'm pretty sure I just screwed a dude with multiple personalities.
I'm a great relationship counselor. My vagina will let you know if your relationship is gonna work or not.
may or may not have entered into a gay civil rights discussion with 6 year olds. Hint: I did.
Randomize
