Is she bent over a couch yet or did daylight savings time throw off her usual schedule?
Of course she said it wasn't that good, I don't bring my A game to pity fuck the thrice divorced girl from work
I would literally rather jam a rusty rail road spike into my cock than be here right now. The whore showed up and now I might smash my iPhone into my face repeatedly until I'm no longer consisting of any sort of life.
Nothing says happy gameday like waking up in only an ACC Championship shirt in the qb's bed with a different football player
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You don't want to cheat on your husband, you just want to fuck someone who isn't him.
My synapses wont fire in a pattern that will process those facts
Plus it's a good way to scope out guys. Have them fight for you, like real males do in nature.
you guys have a strange definition of the word fun. I would have said dangerous, terrifying, or life-threatening. of course, bowling can now be described the same way.
I know I've become a responsible adult because this time, I'm not going to do the drugs I found on the ground
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
walk of shamed to graduation. ending college with a bang....
I'm making a will, in it I'm leaving you my skull.
well at least you got laid last nighT. I woke up on a pile of laundry
You tryed convincing the salvation army bell ringer you could do the worm and face planted into the sidewalk... I put a dollar in the can for your performance
Dude I left his house at 5:30 a.m. after you peed on his front door and then tried to fight me for my blanket. Don't even do that at my house or I will end you.
hahahahaha. Worst. Text. Ever.
Sorry I totally pulled a home invasion on you last night
That was super inconsiderate of me
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