you dont need to remember merediths name haha. only jane
no. 1 rule of bromania: no females
Do something fun then. Blow up the house or whatever.
How have you survived this long?
Dumb luck and a deal with the devil.
I know. He gave me a hug and i was like jesus i can just feel the std through your sweatshirt
i don't know man, last time i saw her she was applying sunblock to her vagina
After seeing how much you are able to funnel in a night, I am 90% sure your blood is pure gin.
I dunno if you guys are having weird sex or a most accurate bird sound contest but either way stop doin it
I just told the toilet I loved it. Bad sign.
I just walked across town, stoned off my ass and barefoot in 35 degree weather for him to bust five mins in and then apologize 13 times as I got dressed.
I can't have the last guy who touched my vagina be my coworker.
Long story short I shit on a sidewalk while walking with multiple people. Then sprinted around the streets of Tallahassee in only gym shorts as I tore my toga off and wore it as a cape.
Still riding the magical train of drugs so, yeah, Id say I feel great
LISTEN TO ME! DONDE ESTA LA FUCKING VICODIN!
i woke up and couldnt remember who was in my bed and it was so dark.. i rolled over and started kissing him and feeling his face because hey... if the blind can see like that.. maybe i could too
I am a unicorn in a field of flowers, you asshole.
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