sooo i think when i get back from rothbury i should probably take a pregnancy test
but you would be showing by now. i'd just save the money and wait for a large crap in 6 months that starts crying. then you'll know.
We agreed on being friends w/ benefits. Lets see if that really happens.
Ok, so that was not supposed to go to u, my bad. I feel horrible.
Disregard any previous text from the past 12 hours. Except for the one about scoring a strike while drunk bowling. Remember that one.
we got cut off at 8 am. He spilled his drink three times on the plane. this should be one hell of a vegas trip
That's why I don't chug things. Because when I was a freshman in college tequila came out my nose.
The last party at your house was a sex toy party...it's an obvious transition to baby shower
I'm in a bed full of sand, and also just took my contacts out. Whatever happened yesterday was great, I think.
I don't know what's worse the the fact he has worn a protective cup for last 3 years in fear of being kicked in the balls. Or the fact that the one day he decides to throw caution to the wind and doesn't wear it and actually gets kicked in the balls.
Who in tha hell do u hang out with?
The reality is I'm 24 and I have terminal breast cancer. Fuck yeah I'm going have sex with every hot guy I can. What, am I gonna worry about getting an STD or pregnant at this point? If I'm gonna die, I want to have any many big dicks as I can while I'm still able.
In a bar surrounded by couples hooking up. I'm just staring at one. Not drunk enough. Come save me.
It happened to me once. But i washed off in a duck pond and walked home naked.
it'll be like a game of Russian Roulette, but with my vagina.
u woke up and asked who took ur pants off then realized u did n almost cried over not gettin layed
He was fingering me and I came so hard that I actually broke his wrist. We're at the ER now.
found my cat trying to steal a lighter to hide away for himself. cat what are you doing. don't pocket my lighter.
Randomize
