I really don't want to move...I'm having a motivation problem.
kev is about to show us pictures of the tranny he accidentally fucked last night.
I'll be there in 10
You act like I'm friends with her or something. I only screw her boyfriend!
Oh yeah.
did u really fuck my little sister???
im not saying yes or no but just know that my answer rhymes with "mess"
she has double-d's AND she knows what level Pidgeot evolves. don't tell me she's not a keeper
I take back everything I said about communal showers
the fact that i fell through a skylight is the least humiliating part of the night
My professors need to stop cancelling class. Bad things happen when I have too much free time on my hands. Bad things.
He barely got in the door before she began to shriek like a banshee and punch him. His rainbow wig is still hanging from the front porch as a "warning to all other clowns".
Roommate is eating a chimichanga, watching Dr Doolittle 2 and weeping. His Tuesday hangovers make me feel better about my life.
Thought it only fitting this Jubilee weekend to snort lines with a 50 note
Your patriotism amazes me, the Queen would be proud!
Be here at 9 and look fabulous. We have drag queens to impress.
This guy at the airport was telling me 3/4 dudes in his group got rufied at some strip club. One guy woke up in the hospital, another found himself in a random parking garage, the other got back to the room and they all shit their pants. Go Vegas.
I miss you.
Yeah, I don't want to have sex.
he called her and asked for me. he wants to do dinner and a movie
her booty call wants to take you to dinner?
They picked up the lamp, held it aloft, and proclaimed apropos of nothing “this is going right up my ass”. LOUDLY
Randomize
