I hate all girls vehemently.
I just want to know how you cleaned her puke off the twister mat with no gloves. And didn't throw up
Sorority life is like alcoholic girl scouts, plus douchebags in polos.
These welts and bruises from letting gay boys whip my thighs last night are a clear indication i should lay off the tequila.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Dude. My knees have no hair on them and they're bruised. My thigh is killing me. I have about 1000 texts to about 5 exes which I horribly regret. I have pictures of my own penis on my phone. I can't find my iPad. And I have work in an hour.
I just connected with one of your drug dealers on LinkedIn.
The alcohol tastes like we did a beer run at the nail salon
Can't tell if waking up covered in easy mac is the sign of an amazing or terrible night
HahahahahaHAHAHAHAHAHAHA MY LIFE IS A CAUTIONARY TALE
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
SCUSE ME I KNOW YOU DIDNT DO THAT MUCH COKE IN 10 MINUTES
Beer. Pizza. Seething Rage. I will be full of two of these things tonight. You get to decide which two.
After 25 beers and 3 shots my best friend thought it would be an amazing idea to get his dick pierced. We are on our way.
You tried to see how many socks you can stuff in yor mouth and I just put on a damp sock. Is this what bestfriends have come to these days???
I was puking for like ten minutes when I realized my parents were fucking in the shower and were afraid to come out
You stocked up?
No actually didn’t get a chance. If you wouldn’t mind bringing me a brownie and a bottle of Jameson that’d be nice
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