We drank from noon till 5 am, there was adderall and nice jews involved it was just crazy
just ate pastrami before passing out in my hotel room. My room smells like a petting zoo
it turns out jennifers body is not good to beat off to. yeah its megan fox but when she pukes up blood = goodbye boner
I found a knife in my bed when I got back this morning. I think one of my roommates has it in for me
I just got home. Seriously all I remember is taking out my contacts and putting your balls in my mouth.
A burger king employee called me from your phone while you were on their bathroom floorl. Hope ur not in jail....4 realz
Wat the fuck dude ketchup in my bong???
you trust me enough to eiffel tower a girl but don't trust me with a mallet wtf happened to our friendsship
OH MY GOD DO YOU REMEMBER WISHBONE? DO YOU REMEMBER THAT LITTLE BITCH? WHAT'S THE STORY WISHBONE
Three Architectural classes: $990.00 Architectural supplies: $300.00 Changing majors and using my architectural supplies to roll blunts: Priceless
Can I bring some rope too? It's not too early for bondage talk, is it?
I'm sitting in my 10 am lecture drinking a flask out of a dorritos bag...I think people are starting to notice but I'm already too drunk to care
The fact that it was "anything but a cup" now explains the cowboy boots and fishbowl aftermath at the apartment.
A legendary roster of degenerates has been assembled.
my mom just came into my room and handed me a news paper article about women on the verge of a drinking problem... i can already tell its not about to be sunday funday
Randomize