i blacked out hard core.. it was bad peeeed muh bed
This is not my ceiling
just peed in the tub, threw it on Megan.. she threw more back, I got out and threw toilet water on her.. forecast for tomorrow? pink eye.
dude, the summer is killing me. i just woke up cause my balls were stuck to HER leg!
Its like Laser Tag, but more fun because it ends in sex
She has more profile pics than tagged pics. narcissism at its best.
After grabbing my boob for a couple minutes he then decides to ask me if I was awake.
thanks for paying me in special brownies...but brownies dont pay the rent...anymore.
Hey it happens. Think of it this way- you didn't wake up in jail, your face wasn't inexplicably busted and you still have all your teeth. In this group of friends, you're on top!
This is the point in ur life where u should realize there's nothing left but a spiral of shame
I should but I don't. All I see is an escalator of success
well all i have to say, besides fuck you, is YOU try assembling ikea shelves while high on molly.
I just got woken up by that guy wearing a Krispy Kreme hat giving out donuts
Woke up in the hospital naked with my id's taped to my chest. Also apparently puked on two guys, two girls and an escalade (at the same time). Good night.
so then the cop took one last hit off our blunt and then drove off in his car and we just all stood there thinking, yea... that just happened...
Someone should walk up to them and say, "We're sorry, you're too hot to be out here with the other humans."
Randomize
