I have found the one flaw to the great pride I took as a guy to not have to sit down to pee...having to sneeze while peeing.
Ok. In one sink is a hairdrier. Still plugged in. The other is filled with broken glass. What do I do?!
Nvm. Bloody hand trumps dead. Also, where is gauze.
put me on a leash or i'm going to fuck someone
Next time you think about divorce, consider this: a hot guy just walked in and I tried to suck in my back fat.
You flew out of the bedroom, stole two Solo cups from the beer pong table, put them on your feet, clicked your heels together three times
i think you lost all your innocence when you were caught straddling a fence in your thong & cowboy boots by the 40 year old apartment manager
We get drunk and make out in different places. Is that what love is?
my goal for the rest of college is to escape STD free. fuck getting a job. this is more important.
is it acceptable to cross the border for sex?
I gave him head while despicable me 2 played in the background. I think I disappointed the minions
Pooping with Eye of the Tiger playing. Not a single fuck shall be given.
I thought my holiday spirit was gone this year until I got banged to Christmas music. It's back.
I need an honest answer, no judgements. Would it make me a bad person if I fucked the other twin?
The expiration date on my 40 is the same day as my 21st birthday
He ate me out while I was wearing a canada goose parka and a dress hand crafted by a seamstress from yellowknife. I came while watching the northern lights. Most arctic orgasm ever.
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