at some point to night u and I have a 'meeting' too...(1-737): I hope so
I don't llike drinking between sober and blackout. Its boring.
she just fell off the couch. onto a bag of pretzels. her face resembled a cat that just swallowed a sock.
you were convinced campus grass and foliage would give you your daily serving of vegetables to balance out the amount of alcohol you drank.
I feel fat after drinking my meal replacement shake.
I added chocolate sauce, a bsg of m&ms and a crushed up brownie to make it taste better.
My body isn't even mad at me...just disappointed
You've had your dick in my mouth. I don't think there are all that many barriers in our friendship at this point.
We're in ER. He's high on morphine and I'm drunk. Gonna score some bed pans for jello shots.
gona look into getting a tetanus booster and carrying an adrenaline shot...its going off this weekend
It's just one of those days where I'm too horny to function, to be perfectly honest.
Found a piece of twizzler in my buttcrack.
if Anne Taylor knew what she did in her clothes, she'd be banned from the store.
oh come on, it's the perfect length summer dress to blow a stranger in the bathroom in
A Morman just tried to recruit me and I told him "Trust me, you don't want me"
listen I need taco bell and an orgasm within the next hour. I'll leave the order in which you provide those things up to you
I remember walking into a bathroom stall that had a couple fucking in it and giving them a condom and a thumbs up and then leaving
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