i wonder what thom yorke's orgasms sound like
Bad news is im a slut again. Good news is its with people ive been a slut with before.
At least a dozen asian tourists will be showing their friends pictures of me peeing off of Hoover Dam with a cop pointing his gun at me when they get home. I worry about the impact on their children.
What do I have to do to get you laid? I talked to that girl with the ugly dog for 45 minutes trying to get you in, and all you said was "Steven Spielberg is my favorite director."
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Well they kicked us out after we started heckling the acrobats
I just got head while watching air force one. Harrison ford would be proud.
Pretty sure I picked a cat up off the street and took him home with me, fed him tuna, then let him go
Probably twitter. Never underestimate a psycho girl with wifi
I knew this night was headed for bad when I was drinking cherry bombs out of a sippy cup in the shower
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
IT ISN'T. I'M A LITTLE HIGH.
YOU'RE ALWAYS A LITTLE HIGH.
NO. IT'S RARE THAT I'M A LITTLE HIGH. I'M ALWAYS HIGH AS FUCK. THERE'S A DIFFERENCE.
No more chicken and waffles served by drag queens at 2 AM. :(
They asked me my level of pain at the hospital and I told them I called my ex 6 times
So who left their underwear on a lamppost in my aunt's backyard
Imma make him fuck me with my jersey on tonight while I chant Go Jets Go. Gotta love playoff hockey szn.
I just saw puke on the road at the same stoplight i threw up at sunday morning! Makes me smile inside.
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