sleeping like a two year old who chased ambien with a bottle of whiskey.
just peed on the 7/11 floor and casually left. Omg so drunk
he kept yelling THIS ISNT AMATEUR HOUR
She gatecrashed the wedding and managed to get an invite to the open bar reception. Lucky bitch
Are we on the same shift tomorrow and more importantly do you want your pants back?
On the food pyramid big dick are "sometimes foods"
Someone broke in while we were at the bars, window is shattered but nothing got taken
Noone broke in, matt tried to pull a tyrese and punch through the window... were at the hospital.
Like we just had a bunch of sex and then he threaded my eyebrows in bed lol. It was amazing
I think my AA sponsor just booty called me.
I got high and had sex with reindeer antlers on. It was magical and animalistic. Tia the season.
Don't worry you weren't as drunk as you thought. You only fell 4 times.
WINE AND FILM. TALK ABOUT AN UPGRADE FROM NETFLIX AND CHILL.
You would think by the size of the lump on my ass that I would have remembered falling down a flight of stairs.
he just fucked me for my cheese.
He just got really stoned and kept complementing my ponytail
Randomize
