Nope, Im Irish and pissed with some drunk mixed in...therefore punching things is the best solution to every problem.
not only did i manage to get kicked out of the bar, i also got kicked out of denny's. i didnt even know that was possible.
she refused to get out of the dog cage till we sang "be our guest" to her.
The cops walked in to class and arrested 2 guys for possession.
Babe when I told you that you needed to grow up I didn't mean get drunk and sponsor 8 African kids.
We're making herpes jokes very loudly and hoping she notices.
there's a guy in the del taco parking lot doing pushups. let's be his friends
Whoever invented the gimlet should be given a medal and then shot
The bar would not accept my money. I have reached God status here
My dad just said "fuck circus"
I woke up this morning and I had the absolutely horrific realisation that I am the human incarnation of scrappy doo
I can count on one hand the number of good things that happened over the past year.
He was really cute! And I know but it's just like getting my fix ya know? He's basically a human vibrator.
When I woke up this morning I swear my mouth tasted like dick and rolaids.
conclusion: canadians have really freaky sex
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