I am puke
I'm drive I can fine osifer
maybe touching the ground while going 70 wasn't such a great idea after all..
my mom found all the used condoms in my bed side table
whatd she say to you?
no words- put them all in a circle, put the bible in the middle
this cock blocking thing really has to end bro...its one thing to tell jen i live with my mom.. its another to cut the brakes on my car..
2000 dollars has been put in for bail money. Also we're signing contracts
Thanks for walking over, a conversation about David Bowie's dick as a muppet is exactly what my day was missing.
Ok, I have three hours. I'm trying to work out two blow jobs and a taco.
Where are you in relation to the mariatchi band?
Well for decently drunk, in the woods, last-person-i-should-be-hooking-up-with sex, i thought it was pretty good.
Yes. I masterbate to Harry Potter. It's what our generation does.
Currently googling hangover cures, which looks a lot like working from the perspective of my boss.
Is it inappropriate to match with someone on tinder just to ask if the friend in his profile picture is single?
A friendship for the ages born on how horny we both are
Let me call you later. I’m lining up some office dick now that working at home is ending
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