so i just calculated it and i would need to score 150% on this final to pass
Don't make me out to be the bad guy. You practically MADE me cum on your food.
i think i figured out where our problem might have started...when we poured more tequila on top of out margaritas to melt the ice bc they were too cold
hahaha or putting rum in the bbq sauce?
I apologize for getting really drunk, taking off my shirt, bitching someone out, crying, and breaking something at your party next weekend...
I used the picture of my mom and I doing blow job shots in Vegas in the presentation for my Spanish final. Graduation here I come.
Did i actually sleep there? Or did i just get sand everywhere?
Carrying your underwear around in your purse on Sunday morning is its own religious experience
I LOVE YOU SO MUCH I'M ON A WILD DICK CHASE FOR YOU. How many lesbians do YOU know that would do that? HOW MANY????
I do not mind being torn from the first touches of sleep to see a man who looks like that
The struggles of a small town man whore
he showed me his third nipple on the first date. I might have low to no standards, but my god.
She broke up with me. I guess I was in the most chaste lesbian relationship in the history of the world and had no idea.
I have chicken nuggets, lube and brand new batteries, he can stay at work charting all weekend for all I care, I'm set.
No, I'm not a heathen. You two are the heathens, I'm the whore.
I have just discovered the land of milk and honey. and by milk i mean vodka and by honey i mean tequila.
Randomize
