i wouldnt be suprised if in indian your name meant "walking lie"
SEEEEXXX PLEASE
buying booze in bulk is always a bad idea. i wish there was some direct deposit-like system
Well, a cop just pulled up. This could go either way.
I've figured out why I love winter sex. Because I make them leave the beanie on, and we all know I love a man in a beanie.
Just burnt my nuts with a cigarette. Don't ask. I hate life.
You told me that you were mad me because I wouldn't let you 'explore my castle'. Then you said I smelled like a hospital and passed out.
I knew full well that at some point during the night my penis would be out with this costume choice
Its was awkward last year cuz in the middle of it her mom bust In the room with noise makers and champagne
I want to but I can't have a boner while doing a install and working with a customer
Try eating a sub blackout with your uncle. It's not easy ok
I can assure you I didn't go home with a girl, because I woke up on someone's porch
Plus my fingers were hella swollen from eating all these cured meats so it was like I was given it to her with Hulk Hands on
so i just realized the reason you didn't answer my call last night is because the remote isn't a phone.
So I was at my annual OBGYN appointment and when she saw the bruises on the inside of my thigh she asked if I had been horse back riding...I think my burst of laughter then awkward silence answered the question for me.
Randomize
