Dude, she had a vegina. I felt like Indiana Jones cutting a path through the jungle.
i think i'm in class. and blacked out.
You wouldn't stop crying and screaming Hilary Duff doesn't deserve Gossip Girl
he left me a 6 minute video of him peeling a clementine listening to justin bieber
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Im sitting next to shitfaced santa at the cuse game. My plan to be on television is now flawless
You know summer is almost over when ur school booty calls start hitting u up as if solidifying their spot in drunken mistakes for next semester
I'm calling it the Friendlationship with Benefits Zone.
First night sober since New Years. I'm not sure what hurts more, the hangover or the credit dread when I find out what the tickets to Bali actually cost.
Did you miss the part about my hangover needing a day to rest?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I've had to do a couple req orders today and I would like to submit to you an order form to requisition DAT ASS
Yeah i just finished watching someone play ping pong with his penis it didn't fully register until after a few seconds
you threw me on the ground pryed my purse out of my hands screaming " I JUST WANNA HOLD IT A LITTLE BIT". later i found you putting on my lip gloss.
I asked him to sing a song so he couldn't hear me throwing up as he was holding my hair
It's not a funeral, it's a celebration of life. Going commando AND braless is really just honoring him!
I found your birth control, it was in your Crown Royal bag.
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