I take that as "no I'm not driving you to the bar in a blizzard"
How is it possible that i have sex with a guy and he makes YOU breakfast
still in the ER. she tried to shotgun a bottle of corona
We have zombies coming, and all you can think about is cock.
but he gave me mouthwash after the bj. no ones ever done that for me before.
I think you can do her, she seemed pretty set for revenge the second time her boyfrind high fives her in the face.
Attn: you have now used your free, one time admission to pleasure town. Thank you for visiting I hope you enjoyed your trip. All future trips to P.T. Will cost you full admission price. We have different pricing plans to accommodate different situations, and remember it is more of a bartering system than a set price. Your patronage is always welcomed and once again thank you for visiting and have a fantastic evening.
I hope we all get so wasted that we ride the cows again
how did my horoscope know i was too hungover to operate a stove.
Last thing I remember is beer bonging sangria. Dear God.
which guy lost his keys in my bed this weekend?
She just lifted up her dress, screamed "This is gonna be a good one!" And pissed on the pole...
I'm running on two hours of sleep, a shot of vodka, and half of a granola bar. I can't be held responsible for what I do.
He told me their parents think of me as the "drunk friend"...oddly enough, I'm ok with that
I’ve chosen to watch a Mercedes station wagon drive around the Austrian in the rain because it’s live sports. If that doesn’t explain 2020, I don’t know what does.
Randomize
