I just found 22 drunken videos and 4 naked pictures on my phone. We'll start the bidding at $5
I haven't even gone in yet. I'm sitting in the waiting room playing a game i like to call "Who else is here for AA".
i think you ate grass..but you refused to open your mouth so we could see..
it's sunday funday. and also, who can outslut the other day.
Well, my mom brought up me being vague about losing my license and she gave me the intervention look. so i left before they could bring out their heartfelt letters...
You'd be surprised at how many crooked penises are out there
It's what America was founded on: former hookups referring you for a job four years later.
DONT EVER DUNK OREOS INTO WINE . NEVER
Last night must have been awesome because I went to get in the shower only to find the bat symbol drawn on my chest
That happened during battle shots lol
He said his fantasy involved both of us fucking while stuffed into the same overalls
Give me 20 minutes.. I'm going to need to start off with an orgasm to get through this day
AND I woke up to eggs in my bra. Thanks Taco Cabana...
Yeah you're weird. You once told me you would by me a house in the middle of sex. Like as you were thrusting.
So I fucked a guy with his mouth wired shut last night never thought id cross that off my imaginary bucket list
Who the hell tries to steal eggnog.
Randomize
