And my awkwardness continues. I felt the need to send him a text that said roar. I did it.
I am not speculating about which disney princesses do and do not have gag reflexes
What's the appropriateness of putting a 50 cent lyric in my gmas eulogy?
I think I just tested my sobriety limits for unicycling.
We played shuffleboard at the bar last night...another sign we are getting tooooo old.
I felt like a dog for all the times during sex that he said "good girl"
I'll do a soapy photo shoot for you in the shower. No loofas, though. Once you get one of those caught in your nipple ring, you never go back.
The ratio of last drink to last smoke is so tricky. This could go on until the booze is gone
I think I'm allergic to vodka. Or people getting engaged. One or the other. I want to die.
Are the transvestites working the counter tonight? Last time I was there they gave me love advice.
Just told my shrink " this was a year for whoring around"
Cleaning my room at 2am, in just one corner I found six beers, half a pint of whiskey, my flask, 2 shotgun bullets, my crown and shimmer lotion.
So how exactly do I backtrack from motorboating and ass grabbing?
Its perfect, I supply the pot she makes the brownies. I love the culinary dept.
I think it's a bit on the nose for the Uber driver to play stairway to heaven while driving like A psycho.
Randomize
