just checked my call log and realized that we talked for 3 mns. what did i say for that long?
pretty standard. you have fun last night?
apparently....what exactly does 'pretty standard' mean?
typical hot then cold, followed by a death threat.
Do you ever look back at facebook pics and say, "are those really guys I had sex with?"
fuck you guys, stop putting fake babies in my car the cops came again.
I had to take the fire extinguisher from him. He was just sitting on the floor petting it.
21 Horny People Confess Their Boldest Sexual Advances
halloween is the only time that anne boleyn, the joker, a cowgirl, and a mexican man complete with sombrero and poncho can all hit the same blunt
No The bastards made me buy a new one, They don't cover water damage an apparently they consider salsa water damage
So your best guy friend eats your pussy once and a while, no big deal. It's like going to jiffy lube once and a while to let the professionals do it. Your husband should understand .
Remind me to tell you a really funny story about me and arson.
I'm a college student and my dad gets more ass than I do..... do you see a problem here?
29 Shocking Confessions That People Thought Were A Joke
My wife climbed on top of me, fucked my brains out, and gave me money from the ATM. I'm living the dream.
Thanks for fingering me to orgasm during Wu-Tang Clan
Can we both just take a day off just to have sex? Is that acceptable as an adult?
Dollars spent: $83, Girls kissed: 4, Girls slept with:2, Girls currently making me breakfast: 1, Fucks given: 0
Put a Santa hat on my junk. He's wants to be festive too.
How can you tell that you're blacked out ?
You can feel it in your nipples.