Someone should tell Glenda that I only hang with her because she makes me look prettier.
all adderall does is make me the grand champion of using wikipedia.
Only mom could turn an abortion day into a shopping day
there's a picture of you and pauly shore at a starbucks on my phone
i'm taking a spore imprint of the mushroom we found growing in our bathroom and sending a picture to ryan. he will then be able to tell if it's trip-worthy
You almost make it sound as if getting an education to further your career is more important than beer and tacos.
I swear with his long flowing hair and god-like body he looked like Jesus, a bong hitting Jesus
This is the point in ur life where u should realize there's nothing left but a spiral of shame
I should but I don't. All I see is an escalator of success
They had their heads out of the car singing the wrong words to the national anthem as we drove through traffic of people leaving the fireworks. AMURICA
I guess when I black out I feel that it's not inappropriate to grope my gf in front of her parents.... But hey at least I'm starting off 2013 single
Leaving my wallet at work and not going out to drink tonight...SIGN FROM THE UNIVERSE.
I would agree. Whose business is it if I like to guzzle vodka by the liter on my of time? Answer: mine.
I was using my Beauty and the Beast blanket as a makeshift skirt because no pants
the girl whose rug I peed on is here
Day two of not drinking, I think my cat is trying to eat me.
Psychosis secondary to sobriety???
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