At the hair cuttery. A father here with his daughter just answered his phone "ken's whorehouse"...Now I remember why I used to pay more for haircuts.
update: the house isnt on fire anymore, but he is still pissing on all your stuff.
the house was on fire??
shit I thought I told you.
they could make at least 3 episode of "i shouldn't be alive" out of my weekend
ya and he came three minutes into it because he didnt have sex all summer
oh that makes more sense i knew you arent that good
You made a list of reasons why you should be on fear factor. You came up with 2 reasons: "I like fear" and "I am fear"
yea man just watch out- theres a shitload of broken glass in your bed
I threw all my money on the ground and said it was for homeless people and fell down the stairs
You have like just as much sex as me and I have a brand new bf. That does not add up. That is not right.
I threw up in the kitchen on the floor and a guy tried cleaning it up with a spoon at a party.
words I never want to hear dad say again: "Trevor you sexy man you"
Self care is breaking into nasa and launching yourself directly into the fucking void
I have to choose between charging my phone or my vibrator. This is bullshit.
he high fived his dick after we had sex
He said when the pizza came I zip locked one slice and went to the couch and snuggled with it. Does that give you an idea of how my night was?
one week and then i'm back on the sexual grind. a party is being planned in my vagina's honor
Randomize
