..well, okay, so long as I don't have to wear an apron or vaccum in high heels.
nope just do me i'm drunk and easy to plz
So, it's like build-a-bear for your vag?
I just saw a San Diego firetruck. No wonder they can't figure out how to fight wildfires if they get so fucking lost they end up in Nebraska.
I swear that men would be more efficient if they had a semen gauge on their penises
did she really think she could get into the club & no one would recognize her from 16 & pregnant???
Some girl, somewhere, is going to wake up with my face paint on her vagina
Also, your vagina needs a time out and let your brain have a chance to make decisions.
Small children cheering my name. I am not a decent enough human being to feel comfortable with this.
I just realized that the thing that smelled like an electrical fire in my house was me.
I'm FaceTiming Pizza Hut.
Your argument isn't valid... just because I test the waters doesn't make me gay. Makes me versatile. And who doesn't love that!
I just found out two girls I dated met each other, bonded over how much they hate me, started dating and are gonna get married soon.
What's clit gel and why is it in my wallet.
Ugh, once again I had to block the view of him peeing off the hotel bar balcony, I earned those free drinks!
The couple in the apartment next to mine are both opera singers. I’m never sure if I’m hearing them banging or doing vocal warm-ups.
Randomize
