hey my socially awkward cousin is our designated driver for summer, we just have to put up with her wierd shit.
I set the bag of cheetos on the open box on my coffee table while I was watching TV. I was so high I ate half of the styrofoam peanuts in the box by accident. Am I going to die?
I hope so
i stopped calling them hangovers and started calling mornings a long time ago.
Yeaaah, so cabbie laughed at me, and said, "rough nite? Let me find you some music" . apparently OPP is the appropriate ride of shame soundtrack.
Still can't believe they give people like us a drivers license and college degree.
Why not. Its my b-day, you're in town, I'm in town, bars are in town, and alcohol is in town. I don't see anything not good about those things.
My knee is bleeding. This cheeseburger is the 3rd thing I made out with today and I think I got a job with the ducks. Catalina is poppin
I just explained it as we hate everyone in the world more then we hate each other. Thus making us friends. Plus we drink...a lot
I think drinking is the foundation of our friendship
Shit ive learned: when going out to a party, always wear a bathing suit underneath just in case theres a pool with a roof next to it
nothin like your phone freezing up and sending out old booty calls at 11am on a sunday. fml.
My team for a project is gonna have weekly meetings at a bar. yessss. they will do all the work while i thor hammer down beers.
This is the most boring acid ever. I feel like a child. But thats okay, I've been a child before, its nothing new.
I just got hit with cramps and found a mystery pill. I'm gonna stay put for an hour and at least see what happens.
my poor anus
Update: day 5 and Scott has not left the apartment. Still smoking. Pizza roll supply dwindling.
Randomize
